I feel so defeated today. My weight is up again, this time 900 grams. Wtf. I ate slightly more yesterday but still under 1000cals. I'm hungry and starving myself has seemed to stop working so why not eat. I want to eat normal. I want a sandwich. I was hot fries or roasted potatoes. I must resist. I must keep going knowing that eventually my body will get past this point and the number will go down. God I'm so angry today. Not wanting to sound like a whiney bitch but it's not fair. Plus I've woken up hungry which sucks. I will hold off as long as I can then I might make a 100cal waffle. I feel like something that resembles bad food today and a 100cap waffle with 10cal salted caramel sauce sounds like it'll do the trick.
uhmmm oh uhmmm
So I just woke up and I am scared to go one the scales. I am scared to see the damage from last nights binge eeeek. But I cannot have a coffee until I do. Oh god might as well go get it over with, I am going to do it now. Please Ana by some miracle please don't let me have a gain. Damn well no luck there I have gained lots like 2.6 kgs. Well as soon as I get back I am taking a whole bunch of laxatives. And I am so puffy and bloated I need to get some diuretics this week. Well at least I am going to be going for a walk today although its only gonna take 30-45 mins I am expecting there's a huge steep hill so that should get my heart rate up. Definitely got to start doing cardio. I don't even want to go out now :( . Well maybe I should start doing other measurements as well so I can see and overall picture. Ok so here are the measurements: 113.5 cms Waist 135.0 cms Hips 116.5 cms Bust 76.5 cms Thighs 39.5 cms Upper Arms 52.0 cms Calves I am so disgusting. ...
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