I'm the queen of self sabotage. I'm binging. Could stop now plenty of damage done but no I have plenty more I want to stuff into my disgusting self. I deserve to be fat and miserable. I bring it on myself. I'm never going to be skinny. I have no control. I need my control back.
Happy BIrthday to me......................... Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
A heap of friends have wished me a happy birthday and told me to have a great day. Well I won't there is food involved and my weight is not where I wanted it to be. But I plaster the fake smile on my face and say "awwwww thankyou". I am so depressed about today I am 29 and still horrendously fat, who would want to celebrate that? I just want to go to sleep until sunday when mum leaves again so I can avoid all the food and focus on getting thin and boney. Well that is all. JB xoxo
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