Hi Lovelies,
I hate being me. Well since my post the other day I have fallen apart. I ran at the gym the other day and the day after. Yesterday we went to the beach and I had an anxiety attack because I was the fattest personn at the beach. I couldn't take my clothes off and sunbake in my swimmers. I just laid down on the towel and cried myself to sleep on what is considered to be one of the most beautiful beaches in Australia. Then we drove back with the roof off the car and it was so fucking cold. My goose pimples had goose pimples. I keep trying to not eat much in the day then blowing out at night. I wish that I didn't have to stay alive for my son because I can't bear to make him an orphan. Because I honestly wish I could end it all. Then when my partner picked me up from the train station the tyre blew up. So we waited for 1 1/2 hours for the roadside assistance. Then the fuck it switch went off in my brain and I have now consumed 2400 calories.
Well that's me for today I am so done. Going to bed.
JB
Xoxo
I hate being me. Well since my post the other day I have fallen apart. I ran at the gym the other day and the day after. Yesterday we went to the beach and I had an anxiety attack because I was the fattest personn at the beach. I couldn't take my clothes off and sunbake in my swimmers. I just laid down on the towel and cried myself to sleep on what is considered to be one of the most beautiful beaches in Australia. Then we drove back with the roof off the car and it was so fucking cold. My goose pimples had goose pimples. I keep trying to not eat much in the day then blowing out at night. I wish that I didn't have to stay alive for my son because I can't bear to make him an orphan. Because I honestly wish I could end it all. Then when my partner picked me up from the train station the tyre blew up. So we waited for 1 1/2 hours for the roadside assistance. Then the fuck it switch went off in my brain and I have now consumed 2400 calories.
Well that's me for today I am so done. Going to bed.
JB
Xoxo
Its alright hon. Tomorrow is another day. Give yourself permission to feel your feelings in their complete spectrum and then allow yourself to let it go and start fresh. You deserve that.
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