First post of 2013
Well it has been ages since I have been on here. Been totally off the rails with eating obviously. I ballooned my weight back up to 98.5kgs. I feel like a fat, fat loser. My mother is gone for a week so I am finally getting myself back on track. My party is in 10 days and I would dearly love to lose 10kgs but know it probably won't happen. But fuck it I am going to try to try my hardest.
So what else has been happening well after spending more time with my ex I realised how much I missed him and that I wanted him back. I thought he wanted that too, but sadly not. I am sad and heartbroken. I feel empty in my heart but sadly not anywhere else. In fact I have been eating to try to feel up the emptyness but that just makes me feel worse. I am also angry at him. How can you tell someone you are still in love with them when you know you don't want to try again. Mixed messages or what. So now I am determined to lose weight and look fantastic and rub his nose in it. It is a shitty consolation prize would rather be with him. I am trying to distract myself from him by talking to other guys and it is going well but how well could it end up when I am still pining for someone else.
Well I failed in 2012. I am so determined not to fuck it up in 2013. I am going to eat less, exercise more and get better grades. Maybe get a boyfriend. I have decided that 2013 is going to be my year. My favourite number is 13 so it all very fitting.
I hope all you lovelies are doing better then me and I look forward to catching up on your blogs.
Take care
JB
xoxo
So what else has been happening well after spending more time with my ex I realised how much I missed him and that I wanted him back. I thought he wanted that too, but sadly not. I am sad and heartbroken. I feel empty in my heart but sadly not anywhere else. In fact I have been eating to try to feel up the emptyness but that just makes me feel worse. I am also angry at him. How can you tell someone you are still in love with them when you know you don't want to try again. Mixed messages or what. So now I am determined to lose weight and look fantastic and rub his nose in it. It is a shitty consolation prize would rather be with him. I am trying to distract myself from him by talking to other guys and it is going well but how well could it end up when I am still pining for someone else.
Well I failed in 2012. I am so determined not to fuck it up in 2013. I am going to eat less, exercise more and get better grades. Maybe get a boyfriend. I have decided that 2013 is going to be my year. My favourite number is 13 so it all very fitting.
I hope all you lovelies are doing better then me and I look forward to catching up on your blogs.
Take care
JB
xoxo
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