Good ole insomnia!

I miss sleep. When I do sleep I keep waking up all time and have horrific nightmares that leave you a lil creeped out the following day. But it will be worth it when I am thin. I feel like a fraud when I read other girls blogs, ya'll so small already and I look at me and I am a poster child for obesity. I do not look like someone who has an ED. If I had the balls I would put up a picture of me. Didn't lose anything since yesterday and I know I will gain today because I have to eat pastry's and baked goods ffs. I am totally freaking about that. I don't want to go higher I am getting closer to my first GW and now its going to take longer. I look so puffy today must drink heaps of water today. There must have been lots of salt in the packaged food I binged on last night. So having a laxative day monday or even tomorrow as soon as my mother leaves.

Well going to go do something and start moving my fat self.

JB
xoxo

Comments

  1. Nasimiyu21 October 2011 at 10:40

    that's the misconception though, that a lot of people have. there isn't just "one" face of ED's they affect people of all shapes and sizes and backgrounds. just because you're not bone-thin at the moment doesn't make your eating disorder any less valid. On the plus side, when you're not super skinny, it is much easier to fly under the radar. People don't pay as much attention to what/when/how much you're eating

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