Grin for Thin

Hi Lovelies, So I did first day of raw till 4 yesterday. It was hard eating so much. Having my belly so distended. But I kept going and kept eating giving in to the process. I ate over 3000 calories and my diet was 91% carbs. Now I tild myself I wouldn't weigh myself but ild habits dye hard. Expected to see a weight gain. Nope lost 900grams. Wow. Goes against everything we know. Ok so to let you know what I ate. Breakfast- 5 bananas and 3 dates blended with water to make a smoothie. Lunch- 4 mangoes Dinner- 10 small potatoes boiled with 3 roast tomatoes and a roast zucchini (dry roasted no oil). Snacks- Plums, dates, figs and a banana. So its not all great. Feeling loysy from detoxing with a wicked headache. Also has bowel pains but since I'm going now thats decreasing as is the flatulence. Will be interesting at work tomorrow. Well I better go get my fruit on. Much Love, JB xoxo

Hi Lovelies, I can't live like this anymore. I have to change something. I'm going to attempt the raw till 4 lifestyle. Not sure if anyone is familiar with it. Basically you gorge (I really mean gorge) on fruit all day then have a high carb low fat dinner. Like you hust eat huge amounts. I'm am stressed about the quantity. I know I will temporarily gain. This is no longer about weightloss. I  need to heal me. If I don'tdo something drastic I'm scared where I'll end up. I am excited about being able to feel full and satisfied again. I know I'll have demons to battle with food but its time. On other news I'm down 500grams. Usually I would be excited but I don't really care. Since I made the decision to not be ruled by the number on the scale I feel a sense of peace. Well I'll update on how I go. Much Love, JB Xoxo

Hi Lovelies, Only lost 100 fucking grams. I went to gym ate well and only lost 100 grams. That's it I need to get back under 1000cals. Even though I'm eating really healthy food I'm just need to see more dramatic drops. I'm still 5.2kgs away from my goal and only have 8 days to get there. I'm really struggling with depression atm. My son has been getting along great my mums without me so maybe he would be ok if I just left this realm. My boyfriend would be so much better off without me holding him back from someone prettier skinnier and smarter. They would be sad for awhile but then they would be fine. I work on the 17th floor and am sure I wouldn't survive jumping off that. I'm probably too weak to kill myself so I'll just stop talking shit. Much Love, JB xoxo

Hi Lovelies, Geez I'm getting bold. I'm typing this on the train facing my boyfriend.  Yay I had a decent loss of 1.5kgs. Now I have 9 days to lose 5.5kgs. I need to lose 611grams a day to make that happen. That is a big ask as I usually drop 500grams a day. Didn't make it to the gym last night bit we are going tonoght. Plus tomorrow night too I think.  I have heaps to do this weekend so hopefully the numbers keep going down fast. Well thats me. Much Love, JB xoxo

Hi Lovelies, Gah only 300grams wahhhh. Still 5.75kgs to go and 10 days to do it. My hip still hurts but I'm going to the gym today. On other news I passed the exam so I'm done now with university. Woohoo now for the hard work to look ok for graduation. I need to be in the 90s by then so no more slacking off. I found a new brand of frozen meals that taste like real food and a few sit under 300cals yay. They are Michelle Bridges brand. I got my blood test results back the other day and my fatty liver is gone but sadly no change in my cholesterol level. Must remedy this next. Other then that my bloods were perfect. Well that's me. Much Love, JB xoxo

Hi Lovelies, Well I'd love the say that things improved with my eating and that I stopped gaining but sadly that didn't happen. I gained another kg or so. Now at my highest weight this year. Oh onward and downward now hopefully. I'm determined to lose more then 6 kgs in the next 11 days. Today diet is back on track. Aiming for 1200. If that goes ok and I don't feel like binging then tomorrow around 1000cals. Then just going to keep trying to drop the cals. I was planning to go the gym tomorrow night after work but I'm worried. My hip is killimg me. Started aching on my birthday and is getting worse. The pain woke me up last night so had a long day tired and in pain. Going home to soak in a hot bath and take some codeine. Hopefully I'll be ok to go to the gym then. Well thats me. Much Love, JB xoxo

Hi Lovelies, Well what a fat fucking failure I am. 2 kgs gained in 2 days. Today will be better but still not perfect. Going to start walking during lunchtimes amd going to the gym after work with the girls from work next week. No more excuses. I don't have to study, I'll precook meals for the family so all excuses gone. New goal is to be under 112.5kgs by the 29th. That will mark one year since I started the lastest weight loss effort and I want it to be with a 30kg loss. Disgusting part is that even then I will still have another 50kgs to lose to get to my goal. July is my graduation (touch wood) and I want to be under 92.5kgs. Going to Thailand in August so I'd like to be 85kgs by then so I have a buffer to stay under 90lgs while I'm there but still eat. I want to try heaps of different food and I'm quite adventurous so who knows might even try bugs hahaha.  Will be spending heaps of time swimming and walking so hopefully I won't gain too much. They are...